Farewell, Michael Jackson, You Sicko, You...

So, I heard a portion of the funeral on talk radio...

Let me say this:

I realize "he will be missed" and he did "lots of great things", blablabla, but people...I just don't see how he was the greatest role model.

And I'm a Bad, Naughty Mommy. And when a Bad, Naughty Mommy can see that someone isn't a great role model, well...that's saying something.

And I don't understand all the reverence for him. Case in point: Comparing a crazy, black-turned-white, psycho accused pervert ENTERTAINER to MLK Jr is so totally beyond me, it makes me want to scream. He opened doors?! Really?!?! WHICH ONES?!

Maybe it was the doors to teach plastic surgeons what NOT to do, or that they should turn down a patient for ANOTHER surgery after they've had their 20th.

Maybe it was the doors that taught us that crotch grabbing was "really" dancing, or that "oooh-whooo" shouted out in a girlie voice during a song was "really" singing.

Maybe it was the door that made test tube breeding for specific genetic selection - not 1 but THREE kids - the way to go!

No, no, no, it was the door that taught us modern-day parenting skills, like draping your baby over a balcony...or walking your kids around in Muslim-style attire.

Oh, oh, wait, I know, it was how NOT to spend your money and go into crazy-ass debt over building your own private theme park.

I'm sorry, the lesson REALLY was that if you don't like the color of your skin or the flatness of your black nose, you can always change it to your preferred white.

Wait, wait, I've got it...this is it, here it is, wait for it!...it's how to get out of jail for free when you're accused of offering little boys booze so you can molest them. THAT'S IT.

Seriously, no one's heard from this guy in the last DECADE and no one gave a good frickin' DAMN about him until they heard he was dead.

And now they're crediting him with saving the world, ending the arms race, and somewhere in there, bringing equality to minorities.

Did they forget that somewhere along the way he decided he loathed and detested his blackness so much he tried to turn himself white?

So farewell, Michael Jackson. Your kids will miss you terribly, and I'm sorry to them...but I hope that they are raised to function normally in this world of ours, unlike their father. Because frankly, he terrified me.